So someone didn’t like my lovey-dovey blog on “Same-Sex Attraction Among Christ-followers.” They thought that all I was offering was sentimentality void of truth. That is what the world is providing. They are saying that there is nothing wrong with same-sex attraction. It is normal. We need to accept it and encourage it. Let them marry and do their thing.

I am saying just the opposite, and I said it in my first blog. We accept the person, not the practice. It is not right; it is not normal, nor is it God’s way. He made it clear right from the get-go: “God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, ‘Be fruitful and increase in number…’” (Genesis 1:27,28).

God made provision for Adam in his loneliness, and it wasn’t another man. It was Eve, not Steve. He took from Adam and made Eve. And the commentary that followed: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Only a man and a woman can be “be fruitful and increase.” Only a man and a woman can “become one flesh.” Homosexual sex is not sex, not as God intended it, nor does He approve of it and bless it, as some churches are doing in illegitimate ceremonies. That is a mockery of the Word and will of God.

I am not selling out to the culture; I am coming against culture. But for those who live where I do, under the authority of the Word of God, I am concerned that they (we) build a safe environment for people who because of abuse, neglect, improper parenting, or ten other possible reasons find themselves struggling to change a same-sex attraction.

The Pharisees in Jesus’ day were the conservatives, the Bible-believing kind. The Sadducees were the liberals, and they didn’t get along with the Pharisees unless they were attacking Jesus. The Son of Man had far greater opposition from the Pharisees than from the sinners. People who knew they were broken found Jesus a safe place. Religious people who knew they had it right and were not open to change created an environment of judgment and pretense. Let’s learn from their hypocrisy and create a shame-free environment for Christians who know their sexual identity is skewed and needs transformation. Otherwise we will have Jesus opposing us as he did the Pharisees. I’d rather have Him on our side.

Maybe you’re wondering how you should show love to your friend who struggles in this way. Perhaps you wonder if you should give a real hug, an embrazio! The answer is, “Absolutely!” They want it; actually they crave it. Physical love with no sexual overtones is needed and helps the healing process. Don’t single them out because of your concern. Include them in because of your compassion. It works!

7 comments on “SAME-SEX ATTRACTION, part 2

  1. Brent says:

    Amen, Paul! I think your treatment of this divisive issue is biblical and leads with love, mercy, and understanding. Your point about Jesus interaction with the Pharisees and sinners is instructive. Think about what Jesus said on the cross ” Father forgive them, because they don’t know what they’re doing.” So many people in the world don’t know what they’re doing, including me at multiple times in my life! Many, possibly most, homosexuals are convinced they were made that way, totally 100% convinced. As you stated, abuse and many other afflictions from this broken world causes confusion and wounds that manifets in messed up ways. And then there is Jesus and the Spirit of advocacy providing forgiveness and freedom. I would say to the Christians who find it difficult to freely offer mercy and forgiveness, who instead choose to judge and condem, “Blessed are the merciful for they shall receive mercy.” We should welcome EVERYONE to follow Jesus because He has the power and the will to forgive and to restore!

  2. Thank you, Brent. We say welcome to the broken who come to be healed by Jesus

  3. It’s gonna be difficult to get past a person’s survival instincts. When we are frustrated, scared, hurt, and vulnerable, feel persecuted and feared, we can assume offensive, defensive, or flight postures. I fear many don’t trust and haven’t seen true unconditional love. I fear they don’t believe they could ever be truly accepted by Christians. I’m having doubts of my own. I haven’t acted out physically since coming to Christ, but I can’t share my SSA in church because, frankly most church goers can’t handle it. It’s only in a recovery environment that I’ve felt welcomed and not feared as a threat to the safety of others. I know I’m likely to be the least threat there. It’s kinda sad actually, that so many don’t think we actually can change. I know I can change my behaviors, with Gods help, but the thoughts and feelings may be there at some level for the rest of my days. These are a part of my memories.

    • Thank you for your vulnerability. I agree–it takes a really healthy church to embrace the broken and help them through to recovery. May you find that place and those people. God bless you!!

  4. Looking at my reply, I hope I didn’t come off as confrontational or argumentative. I meant the opposite. I support your approach to the issue as you stated. And I did appreciate your willingness to reach out in love. That has to be the key.

    My own mother scorned me as a sinner and told me my children were of-the-devil in her angry and hateful words. Her cult was so religious and self-righteous that they ran from civilization and are boarded up in a compound down in Mexico. That’s clearly not Christ’s approach to welcoming sinners to his bosom.

    I know where my sin comes from, and I know Jesus is my Remedy. I’m gonna be fine. I’m just worried for the others who have it worse, who don’t know they have a choice. I grieve for the ones who have been duped into believing that it’s in their DNA.

    For me, it’s clear looking back that I was a product of my environment. I might be convinced there may be more of a potential vulnerability in one person’s biology than another’s, just as some may be more prone to alcoholism, or obesity according to genes in the family. But I will not be convinced that environmental influences have no bearing on the development of a young child.

    I can’t blame a dad, or a brother, or a cousin, or an uncle of abuse, no one ever physically hurt this young boy, that I can recall.

    There wasn’t abuse, so much as there was absence, neglect, oversight. There was no commission, but I felt the omission. There was a lack of solid role models, a lack of mentoring, a lack of support.

    So many times I remember waking from a dream where I was just falling, and I’d abruptly sit up in bed, just before I hit the ground.

    There was no one walking with me, no one holding my hand, telling me I was gonna be okay. My dad, even my step dad, had great strengths in their own respect, but now I see what was missing then. My God, I know I cared greatly for my own son as he grew into manhood, I pray now that I didn’t leave out whatever it was he needed.

    I’m only saying all this to give you some reference point, some perspective on one recovering bi-sexual sinner. Maybe it can shed some light somewhere.

  5. George says:

    Of course people are born same sex attracted and of course churches are the worst places on the earth for SSA people. This is why most SSA people have left churches, including myself, even though we were brought up and were involved in ministry for many years.

    No matter how pastors and preachers say they love SSA people, it is lie in reality. SSA people are like lepers for them.

    • I am sorry for your experience. My friends with SSA have walked with fear, but they have also found love in the church, but I know that is not always the case. I hope you find it!

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